December 09, 2006

35 weeks and going strong.

Well my titles are becoming lame but as no one is reading this..I'll do what I want. Well all is going well with the pregnancy. I saw my obstetrician Dennis on Monday and he's confirmed that I'm travelling well, apparently my stomach is measuring 36 cm's in my 35th week, so I am bigger then standard. It's so funny at this stage of the pregnancy to be told that I look small?????? Ahhh the never ending barrage of comments, anyway they are harmless and it's all part of the journey which I am truly loving.
What is completely mystifying is the whole work scenario. I rally feel so frustrated by the banailty of it all and having to "worry" about the director's financial woes as if I have to take this on board so it's my focus to 'sell' kitchens. There is NO magic in this and yes it is the day to day reality of running a business but this is all abit 'messed up' really. It's kinda being too involved with someone's personal details. There should be less having to 'worry' and more just 'incentives' so the work can be sold. The problem is it this business operates on being way too vague with all sorts of promises delivered and not enough action being taken. I just want to work with clients and design Interiors that really make an impact. I really must sort out in my head what I want to do.
So that will be juggled along with a baby in tow and hopefully I can find a better resolution then having to put up with all this 'lame' work and find something that is alot more satisfying and rewarding. This current work style isn't rewarding, but the experience has been in terms of my confidence and also opening my eyes as to 'How not to operate a business'. I really do have to look at my options. I'd really just like to get back into a serious Architectural/Interior Design studio and sink my teeth back into working with more variety of styles, finishes and details. Plus being back into an Office where procedures have been honed because by golly I feel I have been led back into the dark ages with some of my skills. I'm not disillusioned yet but I seriously could become that way and I feel I have run my course with this job. I wish I was just braver sometimes with my design skills.

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