Where I go from here...

I'm not sure where I got this image from it was saved to my computer. So apologies for not being able to credit the photographer, I have no intention of claiming it was my own, I just love this image.

Since my last post, my eldest has turned eight and we have celebrated very successfully with a family dinner at a local Korean restaurant (his choice - very happy with that!) plus the following weekend taking 5 friends to see "Kung Fu Panda 2" at the movies, not sure who laughed out loud more the adults or the kids, really fun family movie and a great way to celebrate a kids birthday low-key style.

So with all this busy-ness, I have resorted to carrying a diary plus jotting out days down on the 'family calender' to keep up with the maddening end of term activities and then school holidays where for the most part I have left the days blank...Yep blank, I have had to. I discussed the 'idea' of play dates with a couple of families but after the first week of running around and then a middle ear infection, which is still annoying me. I have decided I have achieved more these holidays by making no commitments and just honouring the invitations and it's worked. Our schedule goes back to normal programming as of next week with school, kinder and childcare days, plus my working.

I have been re:thinking the whole working one day a week at a showroom and even as one day a week the thought of turning up for that day is becoming unappealing after 2 months. Why? Well I was trying to find that answer, the 'honest' answer. Not the over reacting emotional answer, which I am excellent at. Yet seriously I just want to do my own thing. That's it, it's as simple as that. I have worked with *said* business for over 5 years now (give or take the last year being on maternity leave) and realise I need to be re-inspired. I aspire to a new environment, new design aesthetic, a new approach to organising workloads - (time management I think it should be called ) something the current place I work at has struggled with all the way along and it really feels you are beating your head against a brick wall. On discussing, 'new processes' that are nodded at in agreement as a great way to go about things and an hour later (literally) -*Bamm* back to the 'old habit's' it's become tiring and I can see myself becoming worn from the experience of going through the same dysfunctional processes.

Don't get me wrong I am grateful for being given the opportunity to work one day a week and intermittently from home. But it's not the 'right' sort of work anymore, it certainly doesn't fulfil the work/ life balance I am craving. So how do I change this for the betterment of me, well my arrangement is to be discussed next week. I am going to find out my options and go from there, however in my *heart of hearts* I know it may be best to let go.