March 31, 2007

Yesterday was a great day.

Why Tuesday 3rd April was a great day? Well we had a cruisy morning, breakfast and showered in a reasonable time with the aim of getting to our new Playgroup.
Co-operation and keeping focussed as ridiculous as it sounds meant we left the house with ease, so Orion was able to have a 2 hour play with new and original friends.
We then headed to the Library where I found out that I needed to return a DVD I had left at home, hoping I could renew it! The DVD was actually on the reserve list, so we couldn't borrow our pile of books and videos. Headed home ate lunch then went for a walk back to library only to realise as I had closed the door behind me that I had locked us out! I rang MD who said he could swing by in an hour to open up the house, so with pram and kid on tricycle we headed off. An hour in the library was fun, Cleo slept the entire time and I read books to Orion, loads of books.

We received the call from MD he was on his way and would be there in 10 minutes, so off we headed and even with a kid on a tricycle managed to get home before him.
Our next challenge was dinner, so with something of a new challenge for us I weaved some magic with a tin of tomatoes, corn, tuna, freshly cut spring onion, celery and garlic and quite a tasty sauce was created. We normally have a very well stocked pantry, but going back to one wage (since I went onto maternity leave) has meant we aren't able to stockup as regularly as we'd like. We ALWAYS have food, as it is the number one priority but  it's been a very tight couple of weeks. (maybe that should be my incentive to get creative!).

I'm not complaining though, we manage and it doesn't stop me from feeling unfulfilled or having a skip in my step when there are still so many amazing things in life to look forward to. I have chosen not to complain to family or friends not for pride more the sake of hearing a negative voice repeatidly say "we have no money" is such a downer. I don't want to be down anymore, I have been there more then I'd ever like to admit let alone repeat. Without sounding like a matyr or someone who feels sorry for herself, I want to be the person I truly believe I am, someone who can cop it on the chin, take life in her stride and with dignity and purpose and put all those negative feelings benhind her (that I have carried on and off over the years) and get on with my life. It then is a case of channeling the 'right' energies' into all our projects, of which we have so many. That's exciting, why would I want to waste time worrying? I have observed so many times over the years family members absolutely work themselves into a state over money when they can't see what they actually have. I refuse to go there and believe me I am a candidate for 'reacting' at the moment, it's tough, really tough, but as much as I care I am not going to let it get the better of me and that's what's making it great. I can appreciate days like yesterday and that's what's really important.

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